This fella catches a leprechaun.

(I’m sure you all know the standard beginning of leprechaun stories. We’ll skip this part…)

…so finally the leprechaun says, “Aye, ye shall have yar wish.“

“When?“

“Tonight, whilst ye are asleep, it shall come ta ye.“

That night, he wakes up to a knock on the door. He opens it to see a burning cross on his front lawn, and 6 white-robed, hooded figures on his front porch.

The leader, rope in hand, walks up to him and says, “Are yew the one that wanted tuh be hung lahk a nigger?“

Nate ‧ Posted 5 years, 5 months, 3 weeks, 2 days, 13 hours, 9 minutes ago ‧ Comments (0)

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An Asian man walked into the currency exchange in New York with 2000 Japanese yen and walked out with $72.

The following week, he walked in with 2000 yen, and was handed $66. He asked the teller why he got less money than the previous week.

The teller said, “Fluctuations.“

The Asian man stormed out, and just before slamming the door, turned around and shouted, “Fluc you Amelicans, too!“

Nate ‧ Posted 5 years, 5 months, 3 weeks, 3 days, 13 hours ago ‧ Comments (3)

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Three friends die and go to heaven. The first guy gets handcuffed to one of the ugliest girls there.

‘’Why?‘’ he asks.

St. Paul replies, ‘’When you were nine you killed a bird with a stone.‘’ The same happens to the second guy. He asks why.

St. Paul replies, ‘’When you were nine you killed a bird with a stone.‘’ The third guy laughs at his friends and says, ‘’Thank God I didn’t do anything like that.‘’

He gets handcuffed to the prettiest girl in heaven. The other two guys ask, ‘’Why?‘’

‘’Because when she was nine she killed a bird with a stone.‘’

Nate ‧ Posted 5 years, 5 months, 3 weeks, 4 days, 13 hours, 17 minutes ago ‧ Comments (1)

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A guy walks into a bar and walks up to the bartender, slams his fist down on the bar and says, “I’m Neil Brown. I’m six foot four, three hundred pounds. I have a fourteen inch cock, and I want a beer!“ Hearing this, the bartender faints dead away.

Some people in the bar run to help the bartender. As he is being revived, he looks up at Neil and says, “What did you say?“ Once again the man exclaims, “I’m Neil Brown. I’m six foot four, three hundred pounds. I have a fourteen inch cock, and I want a beer!“ The bartender then stands, looking much relieved and says, “Oh, I’m sorry, I thought you said kneel down.“

Nate ‧ Posted 5 years, 5 months, 3 weeks, 5 days, 13 hours, 3 minutes ago ‧ Comments (1)

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I photocopied and scanned in my hopeful tattoo today, at work. You can read on and see it in it’s full glory.

I am improficient at using a scanner and therefore it came out at an angle, but it is the full maze and therefore you should see it and complement Sok Peng’s work. :grin:

I am going to continue my hunt for someone who can do this tattoo. Some coworkers recommended I check out some shops on St. Mark’s place, so that is my next destination.

Nate ‧ Posted 5 years, 5 months, 3 weeks, 5 days, 13 hours, 34 minutes ago ‧ Comments (7)

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