A guy was contemplating suicide by jumping in front of a frieght train. At the last second he jumped out of the way of the train, tumbled down an embankment and landed at the feet of a bag lady. She was ugly and wrinkled and smelled like an old wet hippie.
She cackled, “That was a pretty stupid thing to do, wasn’t it?”
He asked, “Who are you?”
She said, “I’m your fairy godmother and if you can make me have an orgasm I’ll grant you three wishes.”
The guy was down and out and ready to end it all and here was his fairy godmother ready to help him get back on his feet if he could only make her come.
He poked it and stroked it and licked around on that nasty ol’ thing until she finally let go of the big one.
They were layed back there at the tracks as the sun was coming up and he asked, “Well, what about my three wishes?”
She asked, “How old are you?”
He said, “39, why?” She said, “Aren’t you a little old to believe in fairy godmothers?”
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